I Do What I Want

My Doodles

2011-06-25T11:00:00.000-07:00

I usually just post them to FB so here is a link
Facebook Doodles Album

but check this out! I'm rather pleased with it

Jedi Cthulhu

Elder Schroeder

2011-05-20T17:32:00.000-07:00

Holy Elder Schroeder Goodness!

so, sick companion, stuck in the church building. what does Elder Schroeder do? Piano! (its coming along. slowly) my trainer/companion would stick his head in the door between bathroom breaks to give me frequent and completely unnecessary updates on his... status... but the piano is only good till the last drop and I dropped it. so. now what? internet! however given my recent call to abstain from the worldly wide web my web surfing has been reduced to boogie boarding at best.
next?
dip into the deeper waters of Google name search! friends from the MTC and reading their mission blogs etc. nothing sketchy =D so then I hit none other than "Elder Schroeder" just for kicks and giggles. (honestly I wanted to see who would pop up in case a fellow missionary was looking for me!) holy cow! well obviously in hind sight if you Google search "Elder Schroeder" you are going to get "Elder Schroeder" so I scrolled a bit and found this fellow!

"wouldn't that be funny if I sent this home? this is me! life is great!" However I actually recognized this name stealing fiend as a fellow MTC greenie! Its actually not too hard to find a matching name tag. so I click on his blog and its like "Day 4, he's not feeling too well..." past tense, 3rd person, picture of a teddy bear holding a flower, obviously his mom is in charge of this realm. however it says Day 4? he came in when I did. he's been out a while. so I hit 2011, newest update and it has his name tag! aww! and...

HOLY CRAP ITS ME

-yeah. Elder Schr-o-der. and Elder Schr-a-der. no joke. I totally remember taking this picture too, sad I didn't have my camera at the time but I was like "oh well" and OMGandolf its right here on the internet.

http://elderschroeder.blogspot.com/2011/03/all-in-day-of-missionary.html

so I Google "Elder Schroeder"
get a different Elder Schroeder
recognize him as a fellow Elder Schroeder
and I find
This Elder Schroeder
I'm also writing this post
to get a complete monopoly
on the Google search results
for Elder Schroeder
and so less people see this one of me without a jacket I found it whilst Googling:

Elder Schroeder Haiku:

I Google for me

What is the world coming to?

Get a strange Schroeder

Missionary work

Is moving fast in Conway

Please send more Skittles

LOVE
-
-Elder M.V.Schroeder

M. F. Guitar

2010-11-16T20:37:00.001-08:00

some things are just too good to not post
http://www.urlesque.com/2010/07/28/millennium-falcon-guitar-video/

G-unit

2010-11-16T10:24:00.001-08:00

-MV$

2010-11-11T06:49:00.001-08:00

I want to work at NASA just long enough to get a cool NASA jacket
-MV$

2010-11-03T15:03:00.001-07:00

-MV$

2010-10-27T11:30:00.001-07:00

the gloves my destist uses... "non-sterile"? Seriously? Am I reading that right?
-MV$

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2010-10-22T17:18:00.001-07:00

my ice cream diet failed miserably
-MV$

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2010-10-18T06:06:00.001-07:00

I think the rain this morning was Mother Nature's little way of saying "Have fun at work today! ...LOL jk sucks for you!"
-MV$

2010-10-13T15:06:00.000-07:00

Dear Slim Jim,
if "mecanichally seperated chicken" is wrong, then I don't wanna be right.
-MV$

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2010-10-12T15:38:00.001-07:00

worst paper cut of my life
-MV$

2010-10-08T12:54:00.001-07:00

Blog idea #134
-MV$

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2010-10-08T12:05:00.001-07:00

give your Uncle Victor a hug!
-MV$

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2010-10-05T11:45:00.000-07:00

"...in brightest day, in darkest night..."
-MV$

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2010-10-05T10:36:00.001-07:00

Kingdom Hearts on the brain
-MV$

Crazy dream Oct 3rd

2010-10-04T13:31:00.000-07:00

this dream was awesome and I tried to write it down. the bold titles are my near unintelligibly handwritten notes
History hw w/ Ahoy (could be Alex)
I was doing history homework? idk this one. apparently my friend Alex was there

People stew
Nasty part of my dream. for some reason I cooked a leg from some one. Soylent Green

Sleeping
Z w/ friend
L pick me up
E in the truck
after cooking up some leg, I went to bed. I woke up to my friend and her friend tapping on my window late at night. they convinced me to go out for a little bit even though it was so late. I figured we'd be back soon so I didn't worry. but then my other friend came and picked me up and my friend I haven't seen in a long time was in the truck so something was up

Whats going on
we end up on a double decker bus with a bunch of my friends and some celebrities

Famous people
-security guard from Night at the Museum 2 (Jonah Hill)
-Robin Williams
-baby-parents-poo (Kathrine Heigl and Josh Duhamel)

they brought the baby. that was nice of them.

Mac N Cheese

Party buss Downtown

we are all jammin to Coldplay in downtown... somewhere. still in the middle of the night. when...

Text from mom

uh oh. in a very elegant text message, my mom states that it would be a good idea to get home as close to now as humanly possible.

some time after Kathrine Heigl changes the baby's diaper, I pass out into my mac n cheese

Wake up w/ baseball recites

I'm home?

I come to, still in the mac n cheese, I'm on the party bus alone and my mom is looking for me. I'm like, what just happened? its like the Hangover but with Kraft

EVERYONE is home

suddenly everyone comes out and my mom is like surprise!

Crazy dream Oct 4

2010-10-04T12:58:00.000-07:00

had a dream I went vacuum shopping with my friend Dan Aykroyd.

he did not appreciate my Ghostbuster jokes

2010-10-01T19:23:00.001-07:00

"Men are self confidant because they grow up identifying w/ super heroes. Women have bad self-images because they grew up w/ Barbie"

2010-09-29T19:28:00.001-07:00

"I'm Skittlerexic"

2010-09-29T13:14:00.001-07:00

I just learned how to make hashbrowns. I suddenly have an urge to start a hashbrown resturaunt
-MV$

2010-09-28T20:40:00.001-07:00

does anyone else find Burger King comercials terrifying?
-MV$

Quit starin

2010-09-24T13:08:00.000-07:00

All these babies need to quit starin at me. it was cute at first but now its freakin me out. every single toddler at Sams Club today seemed to glued to me like I was a Yo Gabba Gabba marathon.

motorcycles make everyone cooler

2010-09-24T12:43:00.000-07:00

for all intense and purposes, lets say this is my dad:

Its casual Friday. he's got his jeans, respectable stubble. not too shabby.

BUT add a motorcycle into the mix?

not even your dad is an exception

2010-09-21T14:13:00.001-07:00

it appers to me I have a facebook problem...
-MV$

Sounds like me

2010-09-20T13:40:00.001-07:00

2010-09-18T22:03:00.001-07:00

no Jedi where harmed in the making of my burger
-MV$

Crazy dream Sept 17

2010-09-17T14:41:00.000-07:00

Paintball.

it might have had something to do with that episode of Community

we were riding in an indoor rollercoaster with paintball guns (next amusement park ride? I want 10% of the profits, Six Flags!)

the group of us in the rollercoaster were riding around different rooms, shooting either the stationary objects or the other rollercoaster's occupants.

like this but with more black lights

in our rollercoaster there was this creeper kid there who was like stalking this girl in the other rollercoaster and we weren't feeling too good about the creeper kid so we casually stepped away from his BO and ran home. I got home and my parents were like "did you have fun? did you stop any creeper kids?" and I was like "... what. ugh. brb" and they were like "yeah thought so."

so I went back to the rollercoaster place, they were still playing paintball on the tracks over head and they were shooting at me thinking I was part of the game. I shot a few out of their seats and jumped on the rollercoaster looking for the creeper kid. I ran into an old friend on another rollercoaster (aka we were trying to shoot each other at the time) I asked her if she saw the creeper guy and she pointed him out. I thanked her and shot her in the arm.

I got to the ground and ended up on a hall way that was like offices on one side and all windows facing outside on the other. I saw the creeper kid and he was deff up to no good but there was no place to hide and he was too far way to shoot.

fyi. Google images rocks. this is what it looked like in my head.

I ran into a little alcove for a drinking fountain. and watched his reflection in the windows

1st person view. waiting for the creeper...

this was the ensuing fight scene:

I punched him in the ankle. I kid you not. it was even in slow motion.

do you like me

2010-09-15T14:50:00.001-07:00

YES! yes I do. or did. idk. who are you? do you eat? hows next week looking for you?

Ask me anything

Crazy dream Aug 20

2010-08-20T09:31:00.000-07:00

I was on a celebrity reality pirate show as a stand in for Matt Damon because he left and made drama so they just needed a guy to stand in the background out of focus to say its Matt Damon but it was awesome and I started hanging out with Robert Downey Jr. but it was a little awkward because I totally had a man-crush on him the whole time. we were at Islands but a shark sank the restaurant while I was FINALLY asking for his autograph for "my dad". bummer.

so then me and this girl were cruising downtown L.A. at night and there was a collection of people around so we were like Lets check it out and it was a court yard like Desert Ridge but there were a few cops around and one guy ran away freaking about the cops so I want to see whats up and go to the Starbucks where its all going down.
There is one scrappy guy with a sack (probably of stolen money) and a taser and the cops are just standing around. The dream gets semi lucid and I'm like, what if I just punch him in the face? what could happen? so I did. right in his eye. I reach behind him and grab the wrist with the taser and try to wrestle it away but he sets it off. the cops in the background are like Thats assault! We gottem! but I grab the guy with my left hand and the taser is hitting my burnt fingers (4th of July bottle rocket incident) and its burning my hand but I'm like No biggie, this happens all the time.

Dentist

2010-07-20T12:35:00.000-07:00

yesterday I went to the dentist for the first time in... longer than I'll admit
so I'm sitting in the chair and he goes Here, this is [insert name of pokey thing here] its going to feel like a little pinch. I'm thinking Yeah! Right!
so he's poking my gums [ok.. ok.. ow. ok ow ow OW] and calling out a code of numbers to his assistant and all the sudden he's like "... 2... 2...2...3...2... bleeding... 2..." seriously? you have a code for plaque but you don't have a code for bleeding? not even like a wink? its not really insuring an air of confidence.

my all time favorite dream (so far)

2010-07-18T19:05:00.000-07:00

k I've put up some of my cooler dreams but I havent put my favorite up yet! here goes

actual picture from my brain

so I'm at my house and we are hosting a smallish party and these birds come over and are just hangin out on our fence. everyone is like OH cool birds! but I know something's up because I've seen these birds before (in a previous dream) so I'm like NO! and I shoo the birds off but more and more are coming and finally a friggin OSTRICH comes in and I'm like, k this is rediculous and I jump on its back Donkey Kong style and ride it around a bit before I fight it and break its neck but its cool becuase its a robot and like sparks and wires are flying out of its huge neck

so this ostrich-bot carcas is in my back yard and I realise that it has a huge cable coming out of it so I get my mom and dad and we follow it across the street to my neighbor's house were the cable is going into her house. She's spying on us! I rip out the cable and she comes out and starts yelling at us to get off her yard and we're yelling at her to stop spying on us!

best Saturday moring cartoon ever. I still can tell those twin sisters apart

now I'm in the jungle in a dreamscape seguay and I'm hunting these robot birds and I take aim at a robot flamango and an agent, Mr. White (the black guy just off center in the pic) starts to tell me I can't shoot these birds because they are protected. I'm like. no they're not, they're robots. he doesn't get it and won't let me shoot them so I'm thinking, this is just a tranquilizer dart gun. he's a big guy. so I pop him in the chest so I can get the birds. no biggie. BUT he's wearing a bullet proof vest! darn! so he's not very happy with me and is about to get me and has all the sudden huge guns and lots of other agents at his back (apparently the government was cracking down on poachers) and I'm like, shoot.

after saving Earth, Ironhide and the Silver Surfer occasionally grab a drink on the weekends

so now I'm running down a jungle trail trying to not get dead and then a lil toy RC truck runs up to me and then stops and it turns in to Ironhide from Transformers! he is not a small toy and he's blocking all the bullets and shooting a bit at them back and says "Come on! follow me!" so he leads the way through this trail shooting behind us and blowing stuff up everywhere. he leads me to a huge bunker door and is like GO! and he's still shooting stuff

hey this door looks familiar... and smells like ewoks.

so I go in and all these guys and a few girls are there and they're getting dressed in these super bright gaudy colors and there is a girl, very athoritative and dressed like a shaman at the door who looks me up and down (I'm in my usual white t shirt and short kakis) and is like... k follow me. and she leads me through the dressing room and I'm noticing these guys have like helmets and guns and one black guy has like an axe gun and I'm like dang this is hardcore.. wait a minute. they look familiar!

sweet goodness

so she leads me to a glowing closet and inside are a white suit with gold trimings and a sweet blade and a helmet and she says Get dressed. I was totally FREAKING OUT because I got to be the White Ranger!

shown above: me rocking out with a white tiger on lsd

Best. Dream. Ever.

day 1 of 7

2010-07-16T19:51:00.000-07:00

apparently I don't post enough. so. here is a post. idk where this is going...

So I'm waiting to go on a date.

by far my least favorite part of the date. I'm sitting here. waiting for her to pick me up (by her request) and I've nothing to do. like what do I have to do? pop in a movie? hmm... well I could start up Star Wars and finish it later...

basicly I don't want to get my shirt dirty. she told me she was providing food so don't eat. riiight. obviously she doesn't know my eating habits but I can't tell if the spot on my shirt is from the quesadilla or just dripped condensation from my mom's diet coke. only time will tell.oH! I have an idea for a post now. brb

Freerunning

2010-06-13T12:23:00.000-07:00

nothing like watching a pro to give you an oversided dose of humility
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cNvJy0zoXOY&feature=player_embedded

New Blog Name

2010-06-12T21:54:00.000-07:00

I'm thinking of changing my blog name. "Welcome to my world" just seems general, or like a mad scientist would say as the protagonist enters a mad carnival tent with a science theme.
I want something more unique, preferably American or Star Wars themed with "awesome" in the title

Land of the Free, Home of the Awesome
Just Me Being Awesome
I don't make it till you order it
Awesome Alliance
Empire Smokes Crack
A New Hope
Threes Company
Joe Vs the Volcano
SCHREDD
Schredded
Oh Shin
Epicosity
Mighty Victorious Shenanagains
Without ME its just AESO
My Turn
My Vocal Side

if you have ANY ideas leave them as comments. I'll even take bad ideas. you never know when they'll turn out cool. like penicillin

crazy dream june 8th

2010-06-08T11:36:00.000-07:00

I had a dream last night I was a time traveler in a war against snakes. Not so much time travel as much as the days didn't go in order. Think Sandra Bullock in Premonition http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0477071/

so one day I'm guarding my house, beating snakes in the head with a rock, and the next I'm riding a shark through a parking lot, in my suit. I was riding my shark upside down (showing off a bit) and my dad was like "yeah he's always doing awesome stuff like this"

I wanna jet ski

2010-03-18T16:23:00.000-07:00

Super Late

2010-02-18T01:34:00.000-08:00

so this is a late post. supposed to come before Winter break but school happened... dang school...

My room.

My roomate is Mikey, so he wanted to put a giant M on our door. sure.

Mikey also likes to lock me out of the room. so I invented the BRB Bottle (litteral translation is Be Right Back Bottle) seen in the top right.

This is my friend Mike.

No relation, we have like 5 Michael's on the floor, Harding, Mikey, Mike, Schroeder, and MC

Mike likes to be awesome in his free time and has several computers in his small dorm desk. Here he is playing Halo on one computer while the other takes a nap.

Also in Mike's room is wallpaper of Coke products.

and the top edge of his wall (where the wall meets ceiling) is lined with empty soda cans held to the wall with tape

This is my friend Caulin. aka Snizzle on Mikey's bed

thats his blog. its cool. if I forget something cool he usually remembers it. so check it out

more recent picture

I froze his socks

MUAH HAHAHAHAHA!!!!

There is also a ghost in my room.

His name is Sparky. he is sound activated and comes when you whistle

Midweek update

2010-02-18T01:17:00.000-08:00

so I haven't posted for a while. where can I catch you up on?

Back from a too short winter break, sick for about 3 weeks
spent way too long catching up
quit the band
Got an awesome thing in the mail from mis padres
Super Bowl. didn't do anything and felt... wrong. (got an AWESOME HUGE package from my AWESOME *APPROPRIATELY SIZED parents)
*moved out of my room to down the hall (alot cleaner and quieter)
*Valentines Day (another large gift [my girlfriend is worried])
and present day!

* means I'm coming back. I just realized I've had pictures I've been meaning to put up forever but havent. brb

Christmas in January

2010-01-21T18:01:00.001-08:00

Christmas was too short! I guess thats what happens when you wrap up classes in a 2 week fury and then coast into a 2 week break. There was no Christmas-hype. No Late-Night-Tree-Shopping. No Tree-Decorating. No FIRE! Gah! oh well. it was still an awesome Christmas.

One of my favorite presents ever from my girlfriend Hanna:

what else? oh right before Christmas break, the band The Young Hurricanes played at a local place and rocked.

ps. I'm in the Young Hurricanes. I'm still not sure if its THE Young Hurricanes or just Young Hurricanes. I should prolly know. I play guitar. This is our newest video from our latest show.

http://www.facebook.com/video/video.php?v=1350068954064&ref=mf

and some pics

Me and Cameron (bass)

one of our first practices

Its a bit of a step up from last year

Not a post

2009-12-19T14:40:00.000-08:00

this isn't really a post. I just found a bunch of cool YouTube videos that I'm going to forget about later.
enjoy!

Highlander with lightsabers
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zxQDc4Z5KIA

Cue Evil Laughter

2009-12-13T02:26:00.000-08:00

This is my roommate Mikey

thats his toothbrush

in a block of ice

you're welcome

Salsa Chocolate'

2009-12-11T04:30:00.000-08:00

No School Tomorrow! Technically....
I do need to do homework. and I will. but right now its 4 in the morning and I'm going to listen to Thin Lizzy and enjoy it.

Thanksgiving was good. got to see everyone. saw Old Dogs. it was alright. then its back to school. same ol same ol. I got an awesome grade on my History project!
check it out

not too shabby for doing it the day before its due eh? the magic of video editing. I love it

So tonight was this Candyland themed dance at the Cannon (our uber cafeteria) and I was like "sweet!" no pun intended.

Candyland was always my favorite. up until I got caught at the stupid mud monster place. in the middle of the game. but so the thing starts at 9 and I want to legit invite my date instead of the usual "hey wanna go?" So I call at 4 to see if I can come over for a sec and she says "my class is about to start let me call you at the end" sure why not. so I'm finishing my laundy and catching up on Heroes (holy cow!) when I realize its like 6. something. call her... no reply. I'm just dropping off a card anyway (its a pop up. awww yeah) so I call her dorm-neighbor and ask her to pass it on.
8ish and I text her, something about "hey call me when you can. I'm about to hop in the shower" subtle hint at I'm getting ready and I don't know where she is. I get out to a voicemail about ...sorry, something came up. I'm going to take a test. it'll be like 30min. I'll see you in a bit
......
9:50 "hey I just got out of my test. sorry I'll be ready in like twenty minutes"gahhh
meanwhile back at the ranch roomate comes in with his buddy carrying 5 ft speaker towers. he's been taking a speaker building class and just finished the project so he got to take them home. they are actually pretty legit. the towers now sit on opposite ends of his bed facing his computer. the next 10-15 minutes were filled with neighbors coming to hear impressively loud Muse and Queen and some requests by me (Def Leopard, Iron Maiden) and his screams of "I MADE THESE! WITH MY OWN HANDS!"

ELEVEN she calls "hey ok I'm done." (the dance ends at midnight. shooo....) ok well I'm on my way.
"oh by the way do you want to go salsa dancing?" uhhh... what? "yeah (list of 6 mutual friends) are going and are asking if we want to go too" sure? So I get there and they don't have a ride to go out so they are calling other friends with cars to see if they can com endear (is that the word?) a ride when I realize all I've had today is a hearty breakfast, a nap, and Captain Crunch. so I grab a Hot Pocket while she tells me about her crazy day. in the two minutes it takes for the Hot Pocket to be delicious, our friends not only found a ride, but ditched us. wow. she's pretty upset and calls them to come back. they pull up in a teeny lil car packed with all our friends. I think it was 4 in the back seat and driver and passenger. and then they're like, pile in! Sure!
So I go to the back and try to lift the trunk but I cant find the latch and then they make it look like I should just pile in the back on everyone's laps. sure! about half way through everyone realizes I am longer than the car. they roll down the window for my feet before noticing that I could just switch spots with the much smaller girl sitting shotgun. sure! so its driver, 2.5 couples in the backseat and me sitting shotgun with my date in my lap.
Then we drive downtown and find the place. I don't know what I was expecting but the purple/pink lit sign "Salsa Chocolate' nightclub" was... new.

10 bucks at the door got my date and I in. The salsa music is about as loud as my roomate's new speakers and everyone is paired off dancing in the purple floodlights. I follow the line of white kids flowing to the back and stagnate there, unsure what to do next. no one knows except for one of the guys and my date, they awkwardly try to show us some moves while the rest of our group is just fine with making it up as they go. did I mention I was planning on going to go to a formal BYU dance previous to this? the majority of the floor is wearing casual polos, a few light long sleeve shirts, and one deep V neck. and I'm in my suit and tie. awesome. I quickly dropped the suit, put the tie in my pocket, dropped a button or two on my collar and rolled up my sleeves. apparently the dark corner of the club wasn't dark enough, as a dj comes over, stands shoulder to shoulder with my friend, grabs grabs his hand, and my hand, and leads us in a crash course of salsa. ...Left foot 1 2 3 right foot 1 2 3 left foot 1 2 3 right foot 1 2 3.... awesome. thanks random dj man.

the next 2 hours were filled with mariachi music, smashed toes, and looking white.

New Moon

2009-11-26T19:50:00.000-08:00

watched New Moon yesterday with some friends. then I thought of this =P

I make myself giggle

Compliments

2009-11-10T23:26:00.000-08:00

today Facebook asked me:
"What is the best compliment you have ever received?"
I thought back to senior year. I was driving to my parking spot early in the morning, playing my music with my windows down like usual, and my friend David was walking by. He jumped out of my parking spot and commented

"Look at that Schroeder kid. He's such a rebel. He doesn't care if he drives a crappy car he's gonna blast his 80's anyway." -David B.

totally made my day.

but then today, via Facebook IM (and after some odd insults) I got this from my friend Tyler

"well be yourself and wear jeans held together with duckt tape and a little bit too tight star wars shirt...
thats the cool michael" -Tyler B.

Holloween - Captain America

2009-11-05T15:22:00.000-08:00

Once a year, when abominations are free to walk the streets.

When the police are helpless against the gangs of Kitty Kows

Where “costumes” are thrown together last minute.

One man is prepared to suit up...

He's prepared to teach the kids

He will protect our land from Canadians

He will protect our freedom

He will ROCK

BEST. HALLOWEEN. EVER.

click to see the whole thing.

Canadians are only good for using their claws when I can't open my root beer

Homecoming

2009-10-24T02:35:00.000-07:00

I'm probably doing it wrong

But we had fun anyway.

I asked her on Tuesday during a homecoming themed devotional. something along the lines of:

“Hey are you going to the dance Friday? No? Ya wanna? Cool.”

Little did I know that there is more than one homecoming dance. There are like 3. So I asked my friend who I knew was going. She was going to the formal dance in the next town down the highway. Hmmmm… PASS! That’s a bit of a far walk in dress shoes. I asked what dance my date wanted to go to. she didn’t care. so I called it the Plan B Dance.

I told her I’d pick her up at 7ish. I made a quick but thoughtful iTunes playlist and got to packing my stuff. So 6 30 rolls by and I get dressed. Blue shirt, “casual” kakis which are not that bad. don’t be hatin because they’re durable! and my black coat jacket mainly for warmth. I print out what might be the most vauge google earth map ever, grab my stuff, and make like a baby and head out. I pick her up, and with no car that means we walk next to each other. She’s impressed we match, a little tip from my mom that works every time. thanks! we start walking, eventually finding land marks and such that lead us to the resturant. I was HOPING that since there were dances and other misc. parties around that a little pizza place wouldn’t be that popular. that was not my most bright of ideas. the line to the door could be seen from space.

Onward and upward!!

we almost circle campus looking for the local ice cream shop but instead found a little hot dog place. so we got 2 beef dogs with pickels and special sauce that tasted strongly of honey. she’s a bit more adventurous and got banana peppers too. that’s where I remebered I had my camera in my back pack.

I tried for an abstract “Grapefruit” pic. didn’t quite work out

we started back to the Halls but passed this really cool park with the unoffical title of “Rape Hill” it apparently has a history. but its still really cool. I was first introduced to the park when my Freshman Tour Guide or whatever you call him pointed in the general area and said “you guys should really take advantage of Rape Hill” we all laughed for a good 3 minutes.

We walked through the park a little bit, found a bench sparcely surrounded by trees and I unpacked. after I got the boom box and iTunes out, I welcomed her to the Plan B Dance.

I started out with her favorite Whitesnake song and let random shuffle on the “Homecoming” playlist I made earlier work itself out. every now and then a breeze would pick up throwing all the loose leaves in our area, deffinately the coolest way to slow dance. also every now and then, an acorn would drop and we would look up expecting an evil squirrell army to appear in the branches. we sang, we danced, we stole things. pretty much the greatest dances I’ve ever DJ’d. we decided to pack up once the sprinklers came on. then we had fun doging sprinklers on the narrow walkway back home. at one part, the park light had burnt out and the walk became even darker. she gripped my arm a littled tighter and looked around at the crunch of the leaves under our feet. I leaned over and whispered “this would probably be a good time to tell you I have a lightsaber in my backpack…”

did I mention she is a self proclamed Sith Lord? as we got closer to her dorm, it was decided that a short dress change was needed and to regroup at my dorm, lightsabers at the ready.

keeping my kakis, I traded my blue button down and coat for my white hoodie and ran back outside. and she’s standing there in black slacks, black sweater thing and what can only be described as a sleeveless Sith trench coat. if she were president she’d be Babe-rham Lincolon. we choriographed (I spelt that right??) the beginning of a decidedly epic lightsaber duel. I would feel biased since I helped make it, but we grew an audience at one point and they seemed rather impressed. it ended on acount of rain.

Best homecoming ever. Thanks MI =)

The Today show

2009-10-10T20:02:00.000-07:00

its a sad day in history when a puppet who has trouble with his alphabet and using verbs and pronouns can get a story across better than Speidi

I could do this...

2009-10-10T19:53:00.001-07:00

I'm The Letter T

2009-10-07T18:10:00.000-07:00

I couldn't find the lyrics to this song. So I wrote them. See a need fill a need!

Hey there I’m Tommy
I’m a T from Tennessee
I start words like tooth and tennis
And turkey, tongue and, tree
Yes that’s me
You must agree I am a T
The letter T

OH I’m the letter T
Oh I’m the letter T
OH I’m the letter T
I make the Ta sound
Yes that’s me

Hey there that’s Timmy
He’s a T wearing a T shirt
And he has a little tea cup
A tea cup full of green tea
Can’t you see?
Timmy and me
We are both Ts
The letter T

OH I’m the letter T
And He, he’s the letter T
WE we’re the letter T
We make the Ta sound guaranteed

Hey there that’s Tina
She’s a T wearing a tube top
And a terrific tam o'shanter
Yeah she’s T number three and I decree
Her, Tim, and me
We are all Ts
The letter T

OH I’m the letter T
And she, she’s the letter T
And he, he’s the letter T
We make the Ta sound guaranteed
Taaa ta ta ta taa-aah
Taaaa ta ta ta taaaa
Taaa ta ta ta taa-aah
Taaa ta ta ta ta tAAA

The Votes Are In

2009-10-06T14:58:00.001-07:00

Madre got the final vote. Captain America it is

Holloween Costume

2009-10-05T18:46:00.000-07:00

I didn't really plan on doing Holloween this year but I guess others are. so why not?
but I can't make up my mind on a costume. I've got it pinned down to Captain America or T-Pain from I'm on a Boat

Capt America is so far the favorite among my friends. but also the biggest to make.

ductape + trash can lid = shield

white longsleeve shirt + blue short sleeve = top. but idk what to do about the stripes. I guess some more tape wouldn't hurt

the biggest thing is the boots and gloves. and mask

I don't really need all the accessories. the shield is the main part. but it would be an AWESOME coustume if I got it all.... I'll see what I can do.

T-Pain

is next up. Definitely funnier and more modern. I've already got the glasses and suit. I'd just need a top hat and a dred lock wig which will pay for itself in no time. and a little black make up for facial hair that won't be hard to find.

what do you think?

My Life is Average

2009-10-02T14:03:00.000-07:00

since the ever popular FMyLife.com site where you can post a horrible story of how your day went

ie: Today, my boyfriend of 4 years broke up with me. Via text. With the iPhone I got him for our anniversary. FML

every now and then you find a funny one

Today, I sat to the right of a girl I really like. I passed her a note asking her to homecoming. She read it, then hurriedly passed it to a hideous girl sitting on her left, who said yes, then hugged me. FML

but most are just depressing

enter solution: MLIA

MyLifeIsAverage.com still funny BUT happy! Cue Disney music

Today, I shouted "Hey look! I'm INVISIBLE!" at people walking past me when they weren't paying attention. When they turned to look I pretend to try and find where the voice came from too so that they would be confused. It worked. MLIA

Today I was in the store and had a little girl, about 5 or 6 years old, storm past me, clearly upset. She slammed the box of cereal she was carrying back onto the shelf and turned to walk away again. As she passed me I heard her mutter 'that stupid unicorn has messed me up for the last time'. So many questions. MLIA

Today, when I was sitting in a sociology class, the teacher was giving a scenario, which she ended with "Who are you going to call?" Immediately, the entire class responded "Ghostbusters!" She gave us extra points on our last exam, which was on conformity. MLIA.

My Day

2009-09-30T19:40:00.000-07:00

it started out innocently enough. just a little dark. a bit misty. but no rain in sight! this will be fun!

Oh how very wrong I was

I took this horrible day in steps.

1st. get to breakfast.

2nd. survive the walk cross-campus to English.

good thing I wore long sleeves. and by long sleeves I mean modestly small undershirt and a paper thin long sleeve button up

after breakfast I began the frigid journey to class. I was obviously not going to make it dry, which was my biggest problem at the time. So I went into stealth mode and Ninja'd some cover to stay out of the rain.

It actually worked pretty well until she started walking past the english building. so I followed my natural instinct.

Grab it and run like heck

ok maybe it didn't end quite like that. but the ninja'd part was real.

She's from Michigan. She doesn't need an umbrella

Hover board

2009-09-23T15:07:00.000-07:00

if you didn't know. I am seriously planning on building one of these, life size.

I'll use it at first, practicing out in an open field with a helmet and knee pads. then slowly I'll reform the design to make it smaller. Eventually I will get to the point where I can jump out my corner office window, turn it on mid air, and fly home. also I want to race a jet ski on it in the middle of a lake.
then I'll get older and settle down and it will rest in the back of the garage covered by a dusty drop cloth. then, on my sickbed with a mysterious illness, I'll tell my oldest son to take it for a spin before I die. He'll get addicted, using it too much untill he burns it out or gets in a non fatal accident. He'll modify the board to fit him better and make a mini pair for my wheelchair. Xavier style:

seriously how cool would that be?

Oh Great, Another Mouth to Feed

2009-09-18T21:39:00.000-07:00

I was tring to find some clever way to point out that I bought posters for my painfully dull room. and this popped into my head.

to the left is Led Zeppelin (whos name I shall never misspell again) followed by Empire Strikes Back.

Not shown is a picture of my dear grandfather, John Wayne, by the door.

I call this piece,

See no Canada, Hear no Canadians, Speak no French

2009-09-16T19:43:00.000-07:00

People seem to worry about my eating habits since pretty much all my meals are at an all you can eat restaurant quality cafeteria.

This is just to tell every one I'm eating healthy

I made a Tetris piece out of my Ho Ho cake and my friend and I had a little contest going on. but I won.

one thing I do miss about home

that there is a very small demographic of guys who like Star Wars on my floor.

My humor is unappreciated

Kanye 2

2009-09-16T15:57:00.000-07:00

In light of recent Kanye events, I have been inspired for my own take on it. Mostly little stuff for my friends on Facebook but I like this one

Kanye

2009-09-16T15:53:00.000-07:00

f you didn't hear, Kanye West interupted Taylor Swift's acceptance speech at the Video Music Awards for best female artist or something like that. MTV's parent company Viacom is trying to take down all the videos of it on YouTube but I found one that will probably stay for a while

Kanye vs Taylor

so after that very public display of attention seeking behavior, Kanye has been popping up everywhere. Some of my favorites are

and

Today

2009-09-14T14:18:00.000-07:00

Today is a good day for taking pictures

Today is a good day for walking

Today is a good day for talking to cute girls

Today is a good day for english reports

Today is not a good day for homework.

Tomorrow doesn't look good either

2009-09-12T12:18:00.001-07:00

I'd like to think I'm introspective
-Schredd

2009-09-11T14:47:00.001-07:00

I was thinking of starting my oral report on Commas with the chorus of Karma Chameleon by Culture Club in the background
-Schredd

Robot's don't get art

2009-09-09T22:43:00.001-07:00

My Life: the movie!

2009-09-08T18:31:00.000-07:00

There is this app on Facebook called LivingSocial and they have a part called Pick5 where you are givin a prompt and 5 spots to fill. I don't know why but I love these little things.

The questions are usually like "What is your top 5 favorite foods?" or "5 Things You Are Wearing Right Now" this question was "Who would play you, your love interest, your best friend, a parent, and your worst enemy in a movie about your life?"

Normally I would pick fun answers like Denzel Washington to play me, but I went pretty realistic this time.

The Casting (so far):

Michael - Aaron Eckhart (Dark Knight)

Love Intrest (TBA) - Kristin Chenoweth (Wicked)

Tyler - Matt Damon (I upgraded a bit)

Dad - Adrian Paul (I thought this was rather close)

Worst Enemy (TBA) - Carrot Top Since I don't really have any rivals enemies. I figure if Carrot Top went to my high school, we would not be friends.

Why bother posting this? Well if some writer/producer is bored and doesn't have anything better to do, I might as well give him some options right?

Baby Names

2009-09-08T16:08:00.000-07:00

Boy:
Caractacus
Luke
Galvin
Andiron
Ben
Lynyrd
Skynyrd
Webster
David

Girl:
Leia (or Carrie)
Sarah Tonin
Bradlie
Yoko
Sammie
Lavender
Truly

Thunder Kiss '65

2009-09-06T16:05:00.001-07:00

Do you know what he's saying? This is the best I can come up with

Well sweet a lil bit gets hot in hell a cheatin on the HEY YOU
Right spittin on with me the Holocaust a how'll kick you out TOMORROW
Break down agony I said a extacy and novacaaa
we're ridin on the wall, Thunda kissin, nineteen sixta fiiiiive yeah, wow, fiiiive yeah, wow
demon wallses comin a down in 19 60 5 5 5
A lil bit fasta now you lookin like a ale yin poetry
my throwin socks now and freak out inside a me
my cooole salvation a ringabroration on the jam
the power of the plaster movin faster nineteen sixty fiiiiive yeah, wow, fiiiiive yeah, wow
sleazy waltzes comin a now in 19 60 5 5 5
[you're all shook up arn't ya baby?
I never try any thing, I just do it
wanna try me?]
aaaaAAAAA SLOAW! yeahh yeahhh gimmie that gimmie that OWW! OW! ow! yeahh!
rollin like a super sonic another boot an get down on it
exnay a million miles I gotta heart a comic's style
thinkin lookin easy and after what I said
the last is down a kick a louse is in my heaaad
yeah, yeah, yeahhh gimmie that gimmie that NOW gimmie that gimmie that NOW x2
step inside the moon shot with the hounds from hello resurection
wahno put the cat can your ears stop the affection
well you can't take it with you but you can getjerdenaaa
some like it hot yeah twisted nineteen sixty fiiiive yah, wow fiiive yeah wow
the demon watch meh comin loud in 19 60 5 5 5

Freshman 15

2009-09-05T14:04:00.001-07:00

I'm ok...

2009-09-04T17:19:00.001-07:00

One of THEM

2009-09-03T11:50:00.001-07:00

Crazy Dream 9-2

2009-09-02T14:46:00.000-07:00

I took an airplane trip through time-space and ended up in medieval times. The kingdom was threatened by a giant robot spider who lived in the woods. The King got together all his armies and they went out into the forest looking for it. All the sudden a huge metal spike smashed into the middle of the garrison. All the knights were freaking out and trying to get away but then the
spider ran off. Even though it just obliterated half the king's horses and half the king's men like an anthill we OBVIOUSLY followed it because the king told us too. Medieval monarchy=dumb

So we ended up looking for the monster in a cottage in the middle of the forest that ended up being my old house (if I was looking for a 80 foot horse-eating arachnid, I'd look in my old house too. its nasty) so anyway I get the door open and the soldiers burst in and tear the place up looking for clues. I yelled at them a bit but nothing came of it so I was like Whatev. Looks better now anyway. so I go to use the bathroom but the door hits something soft and only opens half way. uh oh! I flip on the light and behind the door are two wild cats!! idk why I called them 'wild cats' in the dream but it happened. I usually call them mountain lions or Cougars. They looked like a mix between

AND

so thats OBVIOUSLY a 'wild cat'. there was a grey one and a brown one behind the door and they were sleeping till I bumped them with the door but they were chill. and then in the bathtub was a lil baby! much more like the pic on the right. so they were obviously cute and not a threat so I backed out apologetically and turned out the light.

I walked back down the hall to watch the madness for a bit when all the sudden I hear the bathroom door open again and its some idiot with a pike (long pointy thing) and he flings the door open and screams and is jabbing at something in the bathroom! AA! sad! I stabbed the jerk with his own weapon (not fatally) and kicked all the knights out of my house. I checked in the bathroom and the mom and dad were crying over the baby. super sad! it was too late and the lil guy passed away. I took the 3 of them out side and we had a funeral and said goodbye and they jumped the fence to the golf course.

I came back in and the house was a bit cleaner and my mom was making my bed in my old room. I helped her finish and then my dog ran out of the closest to come greet me! Awww! and then the mom and dad wild cats jumped out of the closet! and they sat on the bed with my dog and my mom was like What is this?? haha. and then the lil baby came out of the closet too! and they were all playing on my bed and my mom had no idea what was going on.

I woke up wondering if my dog was ok.

Lucky Charms

2009-09-01T13:59:00.001-07:00

Another Mouth to Feed

2009-08-31T14:13:00.000-07:00

Today's blog brings a cautionary tale.
it was a normal first day, as first days go. I found my classes. I met new people. met old people. found new friends and the occasional, and oddly surprising old friends. its one thing when you recognize your old efy roomate but compleately different when you see your councelor in your swim class.
So I get home. dorm/home. you know what I mean. roomie's gone as usual but someone was in my bed!
Normally this would bring out the Baby bear in me: "Some's sleeping in MY bed! And they're still there!"
but this guy was different. or similar?

HE WAS ME!

how cool is that?? So I woke him/me up and was like Dude! and he/me was like Whats up bro! it was like George of the Jungle in the dressing room finding his long lost brothers in the mirrors. We were pretty much mirror images of eachother. as a matter of fact we WERE mirror images of eachother. he even brought a guitar! of course his was left handed but it was cool. we played a little Whitesnake/Journey/Zeppelin meddly untill our picks melted.

After the epic twin guitar solos, what was left but a congradulatory self-five?

BIG MISTAKE

if there is ANY thing I was supposed to remember at that point its:

never, EVER high five your mirror duplicate. He's probably an antipartical being. its a legit thing. I quote from, A Brief History of Time

"We now know that every particle has an antiparticle, with which it can annihilate. There could be whole antiworlds and antipeople made out of antiparticles. However, if you meet your antiself, don't shake hands! You would both vanish in a great flash of light."

-Stephen W. Hawking

When we high fived, our hands vanished into a sparkling cloud of improbabilities. "Well thats not good" we said in unison. Then the cloud grew, and colapsed on itself, creating a worm hole into 3D. sorry not like "Third Dimention" 3D, HA! I wish! no this was the Double Dragon Dimention, 3D for short. but the confusion is understandable. Its the places were the people in mirrors live, where broken records play forever, where even white rabits flat out refuse to dig their holes, where your social security number is on sale to the higest bidder. The hole grew, sucking everything into it, including us. but in the middle of the flash, I realized I still had my guitar, as did my double. freeing our hands, we pulled the most massive, instantanious rock off. but we did not rock as foes. we rocked as brothers. Everything turned plaid and I blacked out
Next thing you know, I woke up on the floor. and everything was back to normal. well. ALMOST everything...

we rocked so hard, we corked the gap in spacetime and got all our stuff back. slowly normal color came back to reality but there was a few side affects.

But I think we can do it. we already have so much in common

BYU

2009-08-28T18:35:00.000-07:00

I FIXED THE PIC

First day:Thats how got here. thats me in the top left being dropped off by a teradactal
The dorm:

left to right (in varying detail)
My side of the room:
half cleaned bed. I figure if I put it on my bed it will have to get cleaned before bed. right?
White bladed Telecaster, an elegant guitar from a more civilized age

Fridge = half way

My r00mate Mikey's side of the room:
next to the black bag hanging on the wall, Digeridoo. its legit. very aboriginal for being plastic
bed with too many pillows. but I have yet to see him sleep so it might just be for show. I've heard Provo has a high vampire count. well higher than the US average. lower than Phoenix
roll up piano on the window cill. ciell? ceil. window lege

so far BYU is very freshman friendly. only one "man freshman are annoying!" remark behind my back which I thought was rather funny because her friend's reply was "shh! there might be one close by!" I walked off feeling accomplished as I had snuck into the inner sanctum of BYU and they didn't know I was new. Woo!
this seems impressive to me since the age spectrum for guys starts at the low 18 then compleatly skips 19 and 20 since most guys are on a mission at that time and goes straight to 21-22
END.

If I owned a store

2009-08-28T18:24:00.000-07:00

I'd have atheists pay in cash

Insomnia

2009-08-24T00:30:00.001-07:00

a few naps and a Dr. Pepper will do that to me.

I found this paper the other day, I tend to do that. I'll explain in a bit
I have a real thing for alliterations. Please read this as fast as you can. I plan on using this some day:

A bunch of brave broads bearing bologna bombarded my beloved Bronco.
But this soon backfired as a brave band of boys backtracked to find the baloney baronesses and balked any further bodily blemishes by barricading the Bronco.
Belligerently, the bold battalion battered the back yard belonging to a bratty baloney baroness with buckets of bare bananas with out batting an eye.
The barrage was back breaking but the brawny banana barbarians believed to have beaten the baloney baronesses by biblical proportions.
The brethren briskly bolted in a beeline back to base and basked in their brillientness.
The bittersweet conclusion to this bizarre battle is that both sides bare blemishes. My Bronco is bathed in blue paint and your back yard is buried in bruised bananas.

I've bolded and blue'd the text to easily behold the brilliance.
sadly the 2nd part never came to pass. we never got the "bologna baronesses" back

Crazy Dream

2009-08-20T15:06:00.001-07:00

I only picked the most epic part of my dream because the rest was weird and doesn't make sense. like any of this makes sense

I was called out to a dig site about something strange the workers found. When I got there, there was this huge wall of dirt that had huge purple font on it. but it wasn't english. most of the workers had been cleared out but some scaffolding had been left to get a better look at the weird letters.
I was getting a wide view of all the letters when this huge swirling purple spot appeared in the middle of the text. Everyone was freaking out and running away but I just sat there like, Ok... This is new.
Then a HUGE Transformer like robot/monster busts out of the purple spot. He's knocking down the scaffolding and starting to climb out but I'm like Oh no he doesn't... and I transform into a huge white robot/awesome with a glowy sword. epic battle ensues. and my parents decode the purple writing.

Guess what?

2009-08-16T14:45:00.000-07:00

I should probably be posting these pictures on here too. I've been putting these on my facebook page but if you're not my facebook-friend then you are missing out!
these are crazy nerdy and if I have to explain them its not funny. but I'll leave clues how about that? Star Wars episode VI

This was when we were visited by the ghost of Rock and Roll

I brought a souviner back from the Mushroom Kingdom

Blog-na?

2009-08-15T16:40:00.000-07:00

Ahhhh time for another blog. you can thank me later

What have I been up to? not much. this an that. did you know I'm going to college? yeah. they let me in some how. Chalk one up for Longshot. OH! that reminds me... ~dreamsequence ringtone~

ok so for my most recent birthday, a group of girls (who shall remain nameless for time's sake) decided Hey! lets go get Schroeder's house! ...silly girls.

the next morning, and by "morning" I mean the sun wasn't even up. I was awoken by voices. it was that inbetween sleep stage where you realize you left your mind on the pillow. something about "police" and "bologna" and "toilet paper" and then I went back to bed. Retaliation was inevetable

Some of the suspects were obvious and I eventually got what I thought was the entire "guest list" as it became known. Well this was a largish list. Definately one I'd need backup for. SO gathering my closest and mostly trustworthy friends we set into action. The glory of it was that our meeting was also my birthday party. And we couldn't very well talk about the attack if the victim is sitting at your elbow eating your pizza. So we (about 4 or 5 of us) stole off into the night/back corner of the yard. but one party-attendee had heard about the desicration of my home and was wondering what I was going to do about it. So we invited him in the discussion. He was later called Beast. We decided we needed nicknames. for everything. and since we are (mostly) all mega-nerds we went with an X-Men theme. Being the "Luckiest Kid in the World" that I am, I chose Longshot, the super 80's, blond mullet-ed super clone with the power to manipulate probabilities and make his own luck. also good with kids.

Turns out Beast, the one that was mentioned earlier, was a double agent! He had tp-ed my house in the first place. Psh! you KNOW he's not getting away with that. So with some very clever coversationing we got Beast to chicken out, (queue triumphant music) and the party was down to 4.

The Guest List dwindled down to 3 houses and the house was filled with "party favors" (the overall mission was dubbed "Kc's Birthday Party" so we could talk about "the party" freely in front of targets) so that night, Longshot (thats me) Gambit, Wade, and Nightcrawler went out and got all 3 houses. plus one bonus round house that was just for the leftover tp

House #1

codename: Cupcake

about 2330 hours

Cupcake's back yard was bordered by a very handy wash. Gambit and I ran around the block, found a way to the wash, and hopped in the back yard. Very ninja if I say so myself. We tped the place mercilessly. This was Gambit's first time tping and was understandably nervous about wrapping a strange tree in a dark yard. but he did rather well and we got out without a hitch.

We left the front to Wade and Nightcrawler. they were also new at it and Gambit was happy to show off his newly found toilet papering technique.

House #2

codename: Pinata (because we were going to hit it the hardest)

about 0100 hours

This was the veritable fortress. spaning 2 regular house lots, it was equiped with motion sensing lights, sugar high children with small blatters, and a very yappy dog. any number of these things could have blown our cover. the Death Star of tp targets. I climbed the predetermined tree and "mummy wraped" the thing head to toe. ...er, leaf to root. whatever. this took eternally long and it was litterally 90 degrees. gotta love AZ. after my mummified tree, Gambit and Nightcrawler (Wade had to go home) began to motion their concerns about dehydration. so I thought,

plan A: drink from the hose. practical, possible, probable. but this was no ordinary tp job. so that was out.

plan B: drink from the pool. impractical, possible, improbable. hmmm... our story would sound impressive if we say we drank from the target's pool. but its pretty gross. especially with all those saltine crackers and tp we just threw in it. so thats out.

so whats left? plan C. I always save plan C for the most crazy, outragious option that would be a longshot to pull off. whats this crazy plan you say? I tell my companions, Don't worry about it. I got it.

....build the suspence.... build it.... and....

Intermission!

I drew this at the line for the midnight showing of Transformers 2

thats the whole X-Men gang

(clockwise from left, Nightcrawler, Jean Grey, Cable, Wade, Longshot, and Gambit)

Z-105 AND WE'RE BACK!

Plan C you say?

Plan C: get some glasses from inside. ...wait? what? yes I said it. go inside the house we are vandlizing. impractical, impossible, improbable you say? perfect.

So I check the backdoor, *click and its open. it opens with the classic *crrreeeeaaaakkkk that you're sure the entire neighborhood could hear. but its open! I've been to their house a million times. practically lived there for a week last summer so even though its pitch black I got it down. I step over the invisible toys, and on to the scariest part. the staircase. this is the kind of Indiana Jones spiral staircase where the wrong step too close to the center and you slide back down to the bottom. but too far out and you're bound to kick a wookie action figure and loose your balance. the stairs go from a size 2 shoe on one end and a size 9 on the other. not an easy task for my 11's

but I'm up. the computer is on, a make shift night light, and on the other side is the parent's room. scary enough as it is but somehow being there in the middle of the night, unwelcome, is something new entirely. a short walk to the kitchen, find the cabinet with the cups, and fill two glasses. I drank them both. no sence in making multiple trips. filling the cups again I thought. Man, this is awesome. My kids can never know about this. and then out to the side garage door. it was locked but not to the inside. HA! made it!
I find my comrads and they greedily sip the water. finally Nightcrawler catches on. "Dude, are these their cups?"

"yes. yes they are"

oh and the barricades! at the inital attack on my house, barricades were used to block the front door. so one was placed at each house and "Pinata" got 2. on the roof. aww yeah...

long story short I ninja-ed my way up to the top of the house, had Nightcrawler and Gambit hoist up the barricades, and (using the utmost stratigery) planted them on opposite sides of the front door area. but now to get down.... the way I came? the easy and clear choice? no way! I trailblaze to the wall dividing Pinata from its neighbor. I quickly manuver down to the wall... but there is a tree in the way. well too late to change course! onward!

I get on my belly (it was a crazy thick tree) and crawl between the tight spot of branches and brick to the front. but... now what? I had no exit stratagy.

Plan A: Jump and pray

Plan B: hang off the now tangible roof and drop

Plan C: Shimmy down the palm tree, George of the Jungle style

HA! NO WAY I'm doing palm trees again! I still have scars. but thats another story

plan B works

so now we're about 2 rolls from being done and a whole bag of saltines. what to do what to do... well I have to return the cups anyway so... lets go in! Muah ha ha ha ha ha!!!

we go inside, I'm explaining the layout of the house the entire time like a lame Disney attraction, "stay to the right of the stairs. on the left is ____'s room. ahead is the kitchen..."

we deposit the crackers on the sofa and the living room area. I drop the cups in the sink and we take off. WOOT!

House #3

approx 0400

"Jelly Beans"

in our defense, we were tired and didn't have alot to do at this house. we pretty much just threw a few random rolls and dropped our calling card (a mini can of Spam with an X on it) and took off. we figured the lack of trying would be an insult in its self. turns out she was out of town anyway.

House #4

approx 0500

"Bonus Round"

Gambit had a score to settle. and this house had an AMAZING tree. done in under 15 min

all an all it was amazing. don't tell my kids

Shout Out

2009-07-08T23:48:00.001-07:00

I'd like to give a little shout out to friendly people.

Thank you.

But to tell that story, first I have to tell this story. But how far back should I go? This story could have a lot of good beginings but I feel like rambling.

This story begins at Blockbuster. I wanted to rent a game (inFAMOUS for you kids keeping score at home) but Blockbuster, being the sad Netflix-wannabe it is, was out of stock. So, not wanting to go home empty handed, decided on getting Ghostbusters: the video game! But guess what? My friend Kevin was there! not working, just getting a movie. And he was friendly. NEXT
So I've been home, playing Ghostbusters for about 2 days straight, sleeping and eating between ectoplasmic encounters, when my mom finally has gone cabin feaver. But its my mom's special brand where she needs me to get out of the house. Which is a fairly reasonable request since I've recently used the phrase "ectoplasmic encounter" and I've put my Facebook status as "Aint afraid of no ghost*". So I get home, and decide to go **running. But just the idea of phisical activity has givin me cramps. So I tell my mom, "I think I have apendicitus" so she asks "well what hurts?"
"my apendix" a-doy
eventually the apendix got better and I go running. But first I grab my bike. No where around my house is run-able. Unless you like thorny bushes and scary getto trailer homes (nother story)
So I go out. But not just, Hey I'm going running. Leave everything at home because I'll be right back. No. Not the way I roll. If I get a flat tire in the middle of a zombie uprising, I have a plan B. So I go out with my lil swim bag, with my lil amp speakers (I run in style) and a quart I think of ice water (its in a lil square milk jug. my new favorie water bottle). Now you might say, "but, with your running shorts, how are you going to transport the water jug?" hardcore style. on a belt.
So I go out on my bike. With my backpack, provisions, and my knife on my hip. It only takes one hobo with an HIV shank to ruin your night. Live and learn.
So I'm goin. Its a nice night. Under 100 degrees. Maybe. So then I get up to a crosswalk. bust out my water jug and wait for the light. light turns and I start to walk my bike, old habits die hard. And I was thinkin to myself, I don't have my glasses. I can't even read the DO NOT WALK sign. and then I thought, as I passed the cars waiting for their light, what if one of these cars is a jerk and honks their horn? I'm going to jump and they're going to laugh and I'm not even going to be able to see- and right as I thought that, interrupting my thought. I hear it.
"YO SchrOeder!" they said it wrong but I let it pass
I turn to my left, into the blinding headlights and I used that as my excuse not to see. I don't know who this kid is, sounds like a kid on the swim team though. That would explain the SchrOder and not the SchrAder. So I return, "HEY whats up man!" with a smile. I don't know who that kid was, but this blog is to him.

Ghost bustin' makes me feel good

*cause I aint
**I use the term running very loosely

Little Fake Drives

2009-06-11T01:02:00.000-07:00

These are the little plastic things you find randomly in your computer. The little black bookmarks you find in your computer acting as a space saver. I just found one. A little black orniment amid all the glorious new tech. Whats it for? WHO KNOWS? Why did Dell put this little guy in my laptop? Well whatever its for, I'm replacing the little bugger with an ACTUAL SD card. Why you ask? Why replace this mysterious little devil with something that is actually useful? Because I got a new phone! and the old card is, well, just that. Old.

Pictures coming soon

What to do...

2009-06-09T16:58:00.000-07:00

What do you do when you have the world at your fingertips?
Turn on iTunes. Stare at the world a bit. Poke around a little till your attention span burns out and head to the blog.
The new laptop is crazy amazing. But it turns out its not quite all mine yet. Either that or just the simple fact that no computer is safe from my mom. You ever have that feeling when you get something new, and its super cool, but you can't play with it yet? I get itchy.

*Thank you notes*
Are dumb. Whats the point? They are redundaint. The card already says Thanks on the front. That should be enough. Besides, the card reciver is going to toss the stupid thing in the trash the next day. Why bother? 30% of the worlds landfills are thank you cards. I'm just adding to the problem. Thank you cards are not eco friendly.
I have an idea. Lets all give the Thank you card that keeps on thank-ing and NOT do thank you cards and save our planet. A thank you card saved is a thank you card that is not clogged in a seagull's throat. Great idea? or the greatest idea?

New Laptop!!!!

2009-06-08T22:23:00.000-07:00

AAAAAAAAA
My parents in their infinate mercy have bought me what might be the greatest (or worst) graduation present. Only time will tell what wonderful (or horrible) things I can do now. Yea! (Muah ha ha ha!)

What does this mean for the future? Who knows? Maybe more posts? Maybe more stories? Maybe more elaborate power points? But most likely more Facebook.

ONLY TIME WILL TELL!

fyi

2009-03-01T20:15:00.000-08:00

If you didn't know, I've recently made my own icon.

if only I could start tagging my friend's blogs...

Subs.... blech X(

2009-03-01T19:59:00.001-08:00

We had a sub for my english class on Thurs and Fri
Thursday was awesome
Friday was a character out of Lord of the Rings. I blame her for the following cartoons....

ORC FACTORY/TEACHER'S LOUNGE

MR. MANHATTAN

MR. B

NICE ONE JOHNNY

Words of Wisdom

2009-02-07T22:27:00.000-08:00

"One of these days your brain is going to fill up. You better be carful with what you put in it."

"Whats with all the thats-whats-she-said jokes?? Why do I always get stuck in this position?"

"Those AP kids. They are always trying to flaunt their AP-ness."

"With no power comes no responsability."

"Papa is like a racoon. He likes things that are shiny and cheap."

"I'd go too but, its awkward when I help."

"Lets try that picture again."
"That means it sucked."

"Stupid.... non floating kids."

"So basicly your dream job is to sit on your butt all day."

"He is SUCH a nerd. He looks up lightsaber diagrams on the internet!"
"Thats what I do like every Saturday..."

"Oooo look at me! I'm the Gost Rider playin' tennis!"

"He's got a crappy car but he doesn't care! He blasts his music anyway!"

"Our first song will be Personal Space Invaders."

"Thats when I will fly to Africa in my monkey stealing plane."

"Lets pretend to be rockstars who only play video games."

"I trust you have something illegal for us to do this weekend."

"Its really hard to drink from a golf course sprinkler."

"I want to live forever. So far so good."

Snow Trip

2009-01-23T07:29:00.000-08:00

So on the 21st we had a snow campout in Flagstaff. It was an iditarod. Think dog sled race with people. We all packed up and headed out. The drive up really isn't that bad compared to some longer cross country road trips I've been on. So the whole time up Richard, his dad, Nick, and I popped Goldfish like they were Pez and chugged a liter of Big Red.

We got out to get some food and a little snow ball fight in Flagstaff and had the choice between Subway and Pizza Hut. It was alot harder choice than we thought but I eventually settled on a footlong meatball and the rest followed suit.

So after a little more driving we found the trailer/cabin we were sleeping in. Fun stuff. We all unpacked and popped in Kung Fu Panda. Skadoosh

In the morning we packed back up and headed out for the campsite. After a while we figured out we were on the wrong freeway but we found the campsite eventually. The sun came up like a week later and we all thawed out and had hot coca. We got some new rope for the sled and figured out our order. It pretty much boilled down to, Big guys pull, Little guys jog along side. Sadly that order would be reversed by the end of the day.
Much to our suprise we had a quick game of dodge ball with only minor injuries. I made a fantastic jump roll away from a midair ball. Sadly my landing was on the opposite side of the court I was supposed to be on.
We started the run around 10:15ish and then stopped after less than a minute for our first event archery. Richard and Nick busted out their bow and arrow skills and got us some bonus points when Nick shot a wooden bear in the foot. Then we ran around some more and came to the log saw. Needless to say this was the event for the big guys. Scott and Josh were up first, then Jake and Covey, and Rocky and Jordan pulled up the rear. It took them a while to get in the groove (no pun intended) but we finnished. Then it was the tomahawk throw. My turn. Apparently Wii and my throwing-pencils-into-a-cork-ceiling skills are transferable to real world applications. The point of the game was to throw about 8 metal cut outs of axes and knives and have them stick in a section of log. The highest score before we got there was about 2. After I dominated the high score was 3. Awww yeah.
So after murdering a log with fake weapons I was pretty tired. some more events were, rifle shooting, pull ups, 30 yard dash, the catipillar, and scripture chase was last. I was pretty dead running 2 miles at that altitue and I didn't drink ANY water. So.... SUCKS. I had like the biggest headache and I just sat in the truck waiting to go home. But its still cool. I got an award for the tomahawk massacre. So then I fell asleep in the car ride home. It was nice. Nick bought me some chapstick. Non shiney thank goodness. Then I got home. Did some chores. And then I was like "Ughh.... mom.... check my forhead." and she was like "yup" and I was like "thought so" and I stayed home Sunday.
THE END

A New Meaning to Fast Food

2009-01-09T22:23:00.001-08:00

Tuesday I think it was. Around 10. At night. I was up re reading some old Calvin and Hobbs when my mom comes in. She says "Wanna grab some pizza?"
The trap is set. Pizza. At 10. Too good to be true right? I give her a sideways glance. "okayyyy"
"You don't think I'll do it do you?" she says and meets my glare. I get up slowly and put on my jeans. Waiting for the punchline. I put on my coat. Still no punchline. Shoes next. Nothing. We are acctually going for pizza. SWEET
Unfourtunatly the Barro's down the street closes at ten. But Pizza Hut is next door! Next best thing. They close at ten too. So we get tacos at the ajoining Taco Bell. Then down the street again for a large frosty at Wendy's. Hey we're on a roll. Why not go for more? Next is the Jack in the Box. Got some curly fries and a small cheese burger for me. Then McD's for McNuggets. What else can I get my hands on? One more place. Burger King. Don't really remember what we got there. I was busy trying to keep my blood stream unclogged. And we were home before 11. Thats 7 resturaunts in less than an hour. Prolly less than 45 min.
I gotta say. I was pretty proud.

The next morning I had left over McNuggets for breakfast.

Bite Me

2009-01-06T20:46:00.001-08:00

My mom said I looked like Edward with this hair

I thought I looked more like Syndrome with acne

Stuff I do

2008-12-23T12:39:00.000-08:00

This is a little story me and my friends were (are?) making about zombies taking over. This is a short story about me saving my friend Cameron in the middle of the desert surrounded by zombies.

This is what I do in Phisics. And Math. My friend Josh sits right behind me in both classes and he is REALLY easy to draw. Contrerary to popular beliefe I don't hate him lol

More of Josh. Thats him riding the llama. And him in the car.

I did this guy awhile ago. Thought it was cool. but I'm still not sure about what his feet look like. . .

Massive V 2.0

2008-10-28T17:25:00.000-07:00

This was a scorpion I made out of twisty ties and bordem.

This is popcorn. Yup

This was a heart I found on my truck window. Sadly it was gangreen and had to be removed immidiately.

This is my Mr. Davis costume. He wears suits with orange ties everyday to school and has curly hair and glasses. It was pretty awsome.

Jet pack v 1.0. If at first you don't succeed, call it version 1.0 and move on.

This is Starkiller. He has the Captain in him.

This is my lazy dogs playing fetch with that ball on the left.

Tyler thinks it funny to say he is greater than me using symbols. I think its funny when I put shaving cream on his car.

This is Tyler playing his new song "I Love Bunnies"

I tried to combine Chiefs and Becca in the same space. Mission accomplished

In an effort to save my dear phone memory I'm dropping off a huge load of pics with a minor amount of explainations

v 2.0 now with explainations!

Peter Piper

2008-09-23T15:48:00.000-07:00

This is us T-bird swimmahs at Peter Piper
This is me pretending to be Elvis
From left to right, the back of Tyler's head, Blurry Rob, and me

Pictures

2008-09-23T15:41:00.000-07:00

This was the hardest extra thing to get in TFU. But I got it!!
This is the opening title for TFU
Notice my fat head in the glare lol
If you can't tell, Darth Vader is willing the game to load

Apparently 3 at a time isn't enough. Prepare for more in a sec

Photos

2008-09-22T14:58:00.001-07:00

apparetly I take too many pictures and my phone is starting to reject them by sending them to the card in my phone.

Why do you care?

you probably don't but I will be putting more pictures up! like so:

This was when I shredded a bitter sweet melody about endangered animals in my History class jr year.

Thanks Zack!!This is Steven. I saw his picture in the National Art Gallery in DCThis is a book my bff Britt sent me. idk

Rock Climbing

2008-09-15T15:42:00.000-07:00

OK So I finally got some pictures to put up! Go Carol!

Saturday a week ago was the 2nd craziest Saturday ever. And I blame Tyler. We went out to the lake at like 6 30 in the morning and jump in the Bagley Boat. Tyler shows us all his excessive wake bording moves and aferward I get draged behind hanging on for dear life to the amusement of all aboard.

Our friend Gavin brings his jet ski and takes some of us with him out on the lake. I'm special and get to drive it by myself with Tyler on back. Apparently something was wrong with the balancer thing on the inside so everytime you rode it, the jet ski launched its nose in the air and if you weren't waiting for it, it would throw you off. So after flying at ducks at a constent 45 degree angle [Picture unavailable] we called it a day and headed to the dock.

After a filling meal at McD's I was home and tired. So I rested my head for a bit, seeing as how I had a date later that evening and wanted to be awake. I dosed off to the promises of getting to my weekly chores in a "litte bit." But the best laid plans of Lenny and George often go awry. I woke up around 4 to my cell phone buzzing in my hand. It was Tyler reminding me of the double date later and that since all four of us were carpooling he would pick me up first, in about half an hour. So I texted Becca saying "Be there soon MV$" Apparently she wasn't ready so... too bad.

After numerous yellow lights and a few u-turns we finally made it to our respective date's houses and off we went to rock climbing.

It was pretty awesome even though I got stuck on some crazy Mission Impossible cliff side with no help from the other end of the rope. After a few races up and down, after a few impossible climbs ending in dashed hopes of reaching the cowbell at the top, after we're all hot and sweaty and gross, somebody busts out her camera.

The resulting pictures ensued:

Thanks for the irriplaceable red eye Slope!

So we're done, I get dropped off to an empty house and locked doors. Usually not a problem, I have my cell phone, my parents aren't far, I've no where to go. Except thats not how crazy Saturdays work. Neither parent is answering the phone and I have a regional youth dance to run... er... dj. All I have is my unlocked truck. So after a near McGuyverish brake in of my own house my mom calls. Woo. So now I'm inside all hot and stinky and sweaty and I have to leave in near ten, maybe 15 minutes. I bolt upstairs like a crazy Jamaican in the olympics and shower and am out the door in six. Its a personal best! I take a victory lap to my Bronco and drive to the stake center in near 8 minutes. Another personal best! So I get to the dance and there is this kid.

But before I tell you that story I have to tell you this story

Knowing that this dance is part of the date I think to myself, Self, if you're going to dj, who is going to be with your date? Conversely if you're with your date, who will dj? and yes I say "conversely" to myself. SO I get two of my best dj-ing buddies,Jer Bear and Jordan, and invite them both at the same time with some cleverly vauge texting. I figure the more djs the merrier! Then I won't be up on the stage the whole time, neglecting my date, and I won't be on the floor the whole time, neglecting my job.

Back to the story

So there is Serge or whatever his name is. He wants to dj too! Well thats ok I guess I can just get my friends to alternate with the other and everything will be fine. Except two more say they are there to help. Its 8 oclock, dance time, and I have 5 helpers, Serge, Jer Bear, Jordan, and the other two, and one real dj, me. And no one else but chapparones but still, 6 people at the start of the dance is an improvement.

I'm given instructions not to star the music just yet because of a baptisim going on across the hall but at 8 30 get them out. Music with a purpose! Sounds good so when the clock rolls around to 8 30 I unleash my music arsonal upon the unwitting recent convert. I don't think they will soon forget when they were interupted by Corey Heart's I Wear My Sunglasses At Night.

The dance goes well. Jer Bear takes my place as one more helper appears and the rest loose interest. After a few questionable songs and some line dances the dance is over with no major hang ups. After the djs get paid and the rest go home Becca calls, "Hey we're all going to Sonic afterward." I think, oh that sounds good, I hope she has fun. Untill I realize its not a statment but an invitation.

Us original four, Barton, Bollwinkle, Bagley, and I, plus Bagley, Blackhorse, Bussell and recent aquaintance, Ariel. You can't make this stuff up. I had a delicious cheeseburger and the always amazing blue coconut creamslush. Some time around midnight we all said our goodbyes and finnished off the 2nd craziest Saturday aka THE LONGEST DATE EVER.

Woo

2008-09-15T08:48:00.000-07:00

What age do you tell a highway its adopted?

heres my site
http://sites.google.com/a/thsdeca.org/schroedermichaelmkt1/Home

How about a post?

2008-08-05T14:42:00.000-07:00

Since I haven't been on in forever lets go back in time. ready? good because there are no seatbelts.

woosh

Just got back from the river trip. Way crazy stuff. The adults stayed in this RV that was huge! it was like in Goofy Movie when like basketball courts and tvs pop out of the sides. While we were at the lake a certain someone got the wind knocked out of him and fell off his jet ski. Silly boy. So he got air vac'd out to Grand Junction because the paramedics thought he broke some ribs and punctured a lung. But he didn't.

Good news is that there is one more seat on the truck! look at me being optimistic

So we drove up to Colorado, its this little state east of Utah, and we floated down the Colorado River. Pretty fun stuff. We were kinda expecting some harcore whitewater but it was really just like 3 major cool ones. Next time.

woosh

aaannnd we're back. Everyone ok? No? You'll get over it.

So I just got back from efy at BYU Provo. BEST EFY EVER. Probably best week ever. Everyone is having efy withdrawls but hopfully we'll keep in touch. Some how I got the nickname "Matt Damen." Apparently I look like him.

Fixed up my page

2008-07-03T12:35:00.000-07:00

nothing really big. Just bored
That tends to happen when I watch Rosanne in the middle of the day when no one is home.
OH and I got a cheap radio at Goodwill and hooked it up to a spare speaker I got from my nana. Now the speaker resides above my toilet and is blasting 93.3

Sooo...

2008-06-18T15:45:00.000-07:00

How've you been lately? Me? Well let me think. Last night I went longboarding and I almost could have maybe lost both my legs in a tragic longboard/car collision but Brittany prevented me from going down the hill again. Today I'm kicking her butt at Guitar Hero 3.
oh yeah we got a projector and I've been playing old games on the biggest wall in the house. Thursday I'mma have a par-tay so feel free to crash it.

If I played drums

2008-05-04T16:05:00.000-07:00

I would be this guy only with blond hair

lol this is the coolest

2008-05-01T15:45:00.000-07:00

Poop

2008-04-30T21:24:00.000-07:00

I've been discovered
I blame Brittany